The Lucky Donut

Since getting back and looking through some of my older photos of Las Vegas, I’ve decided that in the summer I’ll make it a bit of a project to try to retake some of the old shots I have from exactly the same angle to show how much the Vegas landscape has changed in, really, quite a short time.

It’s more by luck that judgement that I found some that already line up pretty closely, although as there’s only a handful of viewing holes at the top of the fake Eiffel Tower it’s only to be expected that I’d have caputed virtually the same views I did the last time I went up – in June 2000.

So, here I present some wonderful two-frame, nine-year time lapse photography.  You can click on the 2009 photos to see all the gory detail, if you’re that way inclined.

Looking kind of southeastish in 2000:

The Aladdin (right, foreground) was almost complete (it opened in August 2000).  You can just see the green MGM Grand behind it, and the Tropicana behind that.

And now:

The facelift when it was renamed to Planet Hollywood in 2007 was not so drastic on the hotel tower as it was at ground level.  It’s just a little less Arabian.  Click to zoom in for the full gory detail, and you can see the The big shiny building springing up in the hole to the left of the frame is the Planet Hollywood Towers by Westgate.  The exterior glass was completed just this month.

To the left of the MGM is the top of the Marriott Grand Chateau, which was meant to be cross-shaped but they’ve given up half way through and now it’s just an "L".  The property one block east of The Aladdin that looks like it had a Strip view in 2000 – and now has a view of the back of the PH Towers – is The Carriage House.  You can just see it peeking through in 2009.  An off-strip, non-gaming resort way back then?  Clearly it was ahead of its time.

Let’s turn to face due south.  In 2000, it looked like this:

Now watch, as the Monte Carlo and most of New York New York disappears before your very eyes, without the aid of an implosion:

That’s all CityCenter.  It’s very large and very new (bits of it might open later this year) but it’s not the only thing that’s changed here.

There’s no way you’d see it (or, rather, notice the lack of it) with the poor resolution of the old photo, but if you look way off into the distance now, you can just make out a dark building at the very end of the Strip which is the M resort (opened last month) and a gold building which is South Point (opened 2005).

THEhotel at Mandalay Bay (2003) is also mostly obscured from this angle, but you can just see it behind a NYNY skyscraper. 

Then there’s the proliferation of building wraps and other jumbo-sized advertisements all over the place.  To be honest, in this view it’s not so bad as if you look at the front of the Flamingo, or fake Venice.  But they’re there, and they never used to be.

You can barely see the Strip-facing side of the Luxor from this angle, but it’s been ruined by adverts on the front for some time now.  I remember it promoting the musical Hairspray, and currently it’s for Criss Angel.  Pimping their own shows is bad enough, but when it’s totally sold out as a billboard for liquor it’s just ghastly.

But not content with spoiling the front of the pyramid, they’ve now slapped a "viewfinder" onto the other three sides (visible in close-up above) to solicit interest in further defacing one of the most iconic Las Vegas landmarks.

There’s a banner for Lance Burton’s show at Monte Carlo hanging on the side of the showcase cinema.  That wasn’t there nine years ago.  Burton was.  You can also see the Hawaiian Market place here, which is new but you can’t really tell from this height.  It has a bit of a canopy that wasn’t there before.

There’s also the advert for Dick’s Last Resort in the Excalibur tower, where Merlin once stood.

You can also make out a full-height banner on Planet Hollywood for Peep Show, their new titty show with Scary Spice.  Really.

I’m sure the only reason CityCenter doesn’t have any wraps on its big glass buildings (perfect for this kind of abuse) is that all the windows aren’t in yet.

Let’s rotate around to see Caesars Palace in 2000:

For as long as I’ve been visiting Las Vegas, it’s always seemed like there’s been some kind of construction going on at Caesars.  I’d never realised just how much it had grown though until I put these pictures next to each other.

The Augustus Tower (front of frame) dwarfs most of the resort from this angle.  The Octavius Tower (to the left, with the crane) is almost finished – on the outside at least, which is as far as they’re taking it for the time being.  The other major addition is the Colosseum (round building, looks like… err.. The Colosseum), built for Celine Dion in 2003.

These photos crop it off, but they’ve also begun using all the space up to the sidewalk – most recently for a copy of New York’s Serendipity 3, right on the corner of the intersection.

The classic marquee sign (bottom right, squint a bit) has been replaced (in fact, it looks like it actually moved too) with a fancy new one that has a video screen at the top showing clips of Bette Midler and Cher.  It’s not as good, but then I love the old-style letterboard signs.

"Starring Gladys Knight", in case you can’t quite make it out.  That screen that says "IP" on the side of Imperial Palace no longer works either, I think for quite some time.  I never even realised there was one there before I looked at these old photos.

I’m slightly disappointed that I haven’t found any older photos facing north, which is where the skyline has seen its most significant change.  Off the top of my head: Desert Inn, Stardust and New Frontier have gone; Wynn, Encore, Palazzo and Trump have opened; FontaineBleau is going up; Turnberry Place and about a dozen other condo projects with just immemorable names that I can never remember which is which have shot up.  I’m sure that’s not all.

All you used to be able to see in that direction was the mighty Stratosphere Tower.  Now it doesn’t look much taller than any of the high rise condos from a distance.

Speed: The Ride at Sahara is an attraction that’s been there as long as I can remember, but it’s something that I’ve never quite got around to doing.  It’s the kind of thing that always gets pushed to the bottom of the list when it involves driving somewhere you wouldn’t otherwise be going for something that lasts less than a minute.

I thought I’d missed my chance when the ride suddenly closed last summer.  They said it was closed "for the season", but who knew what season that was?  Then a few weeks ago it suddenly re-opened again, alongside a promotion for a new food item.

Eat a Burrito, get tickets for the ride.  But not just any burrito.  Some adverts called it the "Bomb", others the "B3" (Big Badass Burrito).  What’s in a name?  A two-foot long, six pound hunk of meat and cheese by any other name is still at least five pounds too many.

To get the freebie, you have to eat it alone – in one sitting – and ride the coaster the same day.  No thanks.  I decided to do it the sucker way and just paid $10 for the ride.

So, what was Speed The Ride like?  I wish I knew, because I wasn’t allowed to wear my glasses on the ride and I feel like I totally missed it.

I’m not exaggerating when I say that this is the first time that’s ever happened.  I’m also not exaggerating when I say I might as well have not been there.  I don’t know what makes this ride so special, but if I’d known this I wouldn’t have wasted $10 on it.

If you don’t wear glasses, or you’re only mildly short-sighted, you’ll probably think I’m over-reacting.  "What are you going to see at that speed anyway?", right?  It’s not about the scenery.  Believe me, it makes a massive difference to the sensation of movement if you can’t even see the track in front of you.

I have a -5.5 prescription.  It’s not that severe compared to some, but I’m still completely hopeless without them.  For years I absolutely hated swimming until it dawned on me to get some prescription goggles.  I couldn’t believe I’d never thought of it before.

I used to struggle getting from the changing rooms to the pool, and if I’d had to put my glasses in a locker on the other side of the platform then walk to the coaster I’d have struggled too.  But really, this would have been the best option.  Actually, goggles would have been a better option – they may have let me wear those.

Claire has a -1.0 prescription and she said the ride was great.  I don’t know where the line is between "a bit blurry" and "can’t see a damn thing", but I’m definitely on the wrong side of it.

They may as well have blindfolded me, put me in a box, turned on a fan and shaken it about a bit.  It would have been just as exciting.

To make matters worse, they didn’t drop this bombshell until I was right inside the car.  You’d think the bored attendant might have thought to mention it while we were waiting to get on (there was no line, we were just hanging about for it to fill up) but he waited until I started to sit down before making a "glasses" gesture at me.  You know, fingers at the side of his head, moving back and forth.

"They’ll be fine", I said.

"No, you have to take them off", he told me.

"Really?".  He nodded.  "So where can I put them?".

There were no pigeon holes by the ride itself.  Just the coin-operated lockers that were back on the other side of the platform, and the barriers to the ride had already closed.

"Just put them in your pocket", was the genius solution.

What the fuck?  Does he mean my shirt pocket that can’t be closed, the back pocket I’m sitting on, or the one in my shorts that’s going to get crushed up against the inside of the car when I get flung in as-yet unknown directions?

Before I could explain to him exactly what was wrong with this master plan, the "driver" (if you consider counting backwards from 5 and pressing a button to be driving) in the control room turned on her microphone and came up with a better idea.  "It’s only 45 seconds", she said, "just hold them in your hand".  Fantastic.  You think I’m a pussy and now everyone else on the ride does too.

The safest place, obviously, was to stick them on my face – from where, in the two years that I’ve had this pair, they’ve never fallen off.  In the nearly-30 years I’ve been wearing glasses, I can’t remember a single pair that did.

Watch: I’m actually shaking my head now in every direction I can think of, facing the floor, trying to get them to come loose.  It doesn’t happen.  What exactly is going to make them fly off when my head is pinned back against a seat at 3.5 Gs?

But as I didn’t have much of a choice, besides giving up and getting off, I rode with my glasses clenched between my fingers, gripping so tightly for fear of losing them that I bent the nose pads and had to bodge my own fitting before leaving the Sahara.

If you think risking losing your sight on holiday is exciting, hand-holding your glasses on Speed is probably the ultimate thrill ride.

This one’s better though.  It’s the Desperado at Buffalo Bill’s casino in Primm, about 40 miles from Las Vegas.

At one time (1996) it was the world’s tallest, fastest, longest and steepest rollercoaster.  Others have overtaken it every category, but it’s still a monster, reaching 95 mph after a 225 ft drop.

I love Blackpool Pleasure Beach but I’ve never dared ride the Big One.  It’s not the coaster, it’s the height of that first climb.  The Desperado is actually a little taller (Blackpool held the world’s whateverest records for a year or so) but in the context of not much more than miles and miles of desert – rather than dozens of other, smaller rides – it just doesn’t look so daunting.

I’m also sure that when you look down and see nothing but dust and one oversized barn of a hotel, you won’t feel so high as if you look down and see a large amusement park and rows upon rows of shitty little 6-room bed-and-breakfasts.

Anyway, I rode this beast – taller, faster and more Gs than Speed – last week, with my glasses on.  They were fine, of course, and nobody even thought to ask me if they were likely to fall.

I completed my coaster trilogy here:

The Manhattan Express at New York-New York (or, "New-York New-York", as I noticed it was bizarrely hyphenated on the front of the airport’s NYNY gift shop) is not quite so impressive on paper – a mere 200 feet high and 67 mph top speed.  I’m sure they must have secured some made-up record for the world’s most twistiest coaster around a replica statue, or something.

It still feels pretty quick though and it throws you around lots.  The price is a whopping $14 per ride, but mild concussion is included for no extra cost.

Head well and truly rattled…. glasses still firmly stuck to face.

This Dealertainer at Imperial Palace is apparently meant to be Elvis.

Tell me, am I insane for thinking – right up until the minute he started singing – that it was actually Robbie Williams?  Apart from the obvious clue that nobody in America has heard of him.  It’s uncanny, don’t you think?

Elvis impersonators and dealers probably make up something like 99% of the Las Vegas workforce, so is it really that hard to find someone who can both be a convincing King and deal blackjack?

I only managed to a identify a few of the other dealertainers that were on that night.  I struggled with the obligatory country singer (although "some dude in a cowboy hat" is always an acceptable answer as far as I’m concerned) and failed to identify the Rihanna looky-likey, although to be fair chances are I’d never have recognised the real thing either.

I must be getting old.  Seriously, is Rihanna really in the same league as Elvis, Britney, Prince, Michael Jackson, Stevie Wonder and… err Leona Lewis?

Nope, apparently she is meant to be Mariah Carey.  You decide: